If you could hear The Fresh Prince singing that passage in your head as you read it, you win my respect for life. And to win yours, I'll tell you I drug that up from memory (well, for the most part, anyway). And who could ever forget it? DJ Jazzy Jeff and the Fresh Prince -- the only rappers I have ever listened to and loved. And definitely the only rappers I have ever memorized song lyrics from.

There's a good reason for that, too. One that has quite a lot to do with the reason for Will's success in general -- he's FUNNY. Oh, and also extremely cute. And did I mention smart, talented, and nice? A truly deadly combination (just ask Jada Pinkett-Smith).

Anyhow, if you are aware of the above facts (the cute smart nice facts), then you already know and understand exactly why Willard Smith (yup -- it's short for Willard) is my Boyfriend this week. Granted, he's probably the most happily married Hollywood star today, and he's got kids that are so inspiring, he writes love songs to them that make it to the Top 40. But that kind of family dedication is hardly something to hold against him. Nay, in fact, it actually makes him a better Boyfriend. Because I already know he's great at it. Tried and true. Trained and tested. Those are the best kinds of Boyfriends to have around. They're very low-maintenance.

But, before I get completely off-track and lost in my own little Will Fantasy Droolfest, here's a little background on him for you: he was born in Philadelphia on September 25, 1968. He's 6 feet 2 inches tall (woo) and was nicknamed "The Prince" by his teachers in school, who noticed his amazing way of getting himself out of trouble using only his charm and wit as weapons. He was the second of four children born to Caroline (school board worker) and Willard Sr. (engineer). He grew up in middle class Philly and started rapping in the 12th grade, when he met DJ Jazzy Jeff at a party. They quickly hit it off and became a team. After a few years making it big on MTV, Will decided to try something new and hooked up with Benny Medina in 1989. Benny had an idea for a sitcom based on his life in Beverly Hills and Will was the perfect fit for the role. So, they together they ran a pilot by NBC, who loved it, and the rest is goofy sitcom history. The series ran for over six years, and was a critical success.

Always thinking ahead in a big way, Will started doing a little film work on the side during those six Fresh Prince years. His first few films were not very successful, mostly, in my opinion, because they under-utilized Will. However, in 1993, a director named Fred Schepisi decided to take a chance on him and cast Will in the lead role of the film version of "Six Degrees of Separation," a movie that pretty much introduced Smith to the world of serious filmmaking. And when the action movie "Bad Boys" came out, he was thus introduced to the world of much-less-serious filmmaking, which has turned out to be pretty much his focus ever since. Which is not to say he isn't serious about making films and that his films are also not serious about making themselves. What I mean is, Will Smith movies tend to be light-hearted and fun. Or at least to be full of laser guns and aliens. Happily, Will Smith movies have also tended to be smart fun. And/or they have co-starred ex-Boyfriends like Tommy Lee Jones, Jeff Goldblum, and Harry Connick Jr. These facts combined have pretty much guaranteed that a Will Smith movie is a successful movie, which works very much in our favor, as it also guarantees there will be many, many more of them in the future.

For example, Will's latest movie, "The Legend of Bagger Vance," has just come out. And while it hasn't gotten the greatest of reviews, since when have any of us listened to real movie reviewers? We're much too smart for that. Next out, of course, is the highly anticipated "Men in Black 2," which we already know is going to be great. And following that, it looks like Will is slated to play Muhammad Ali in the biographical film "Ali" (due out in 2001). While it's a sure bet that "Ali" will not contain laser guns OR aliens, it's being directed by Michael Mann, and that's a pretty good sign. If anything, at least it means some Russell Crowe cooties will be around (Mann directed Crowe's Academy-Award winner, "The Insider"). Talk about Six Degrees of Separation. It's more like ONE degree here in the Boyfriend-world.

A little trivia about Will: in 1998, Will was chosen by People Magazine as one of the 50 Most Beautiful People in the world. So was Harrison Ford, whom Will says is one of his favorite big screen heroes (he even molded his character in "Independence Day" after Ford). Unlike Harrison, though, Will is rumored to have turned down a scholarship to MIT to pursue his singing career. Ordinarily, I would encourage a Boyfriend to pursue a back-up education like that. But we definitely forgive Will for ditching MIT, since it looks like he truly won't be needing that engineering degree after all (as evidenced by his multiple Grammy awards, among other things).

And though, as I mentioned previously, Will is happily married with three kids (Willard the Third (nicknamed "Trey"), Willow Camille Reign (nicknamed "Dang, My Name is Really Long") (no, I made that up), and Jaden Christopher Syre) it's okay with us, right? I mean, a date with one of the 50 Most Beautiful people is a date with one of the 50 Most Beautiful people, no matter how taken they already are. It's still going to be a blast hanging out with the adorably charming Willard Christopher Smith Jr. this week. All week. Day and night, night and day. And all the spaces in between.

Now for you oblivious folks from Mars -- if you've read down this far (despite my insults early on), you have by now a list of movies to get out there and rent. Trust me -- you'll never be able to fit in inconspicuously here on Earth if the phrase "Will Smith" draws a blank stare from you. Because the Fresh Prince is big, big, BIG down here on this planet. And not just because the boy can sing. Get your butts in gear, you guys (gals? its?). Or else it's back to the barren Red Planet for you (and we're not letting you keep Val Kilmer up there forever, you know).

MacGyver Factor Score: 98.6%. I gave Willard a pretty high score because the boy knows how to rhyme. And cuz it's about time we got a Boyfriend who could rhyme. One who'll never never mime, and one who'll always give a dime. Or a lime. Or, you know, whatever.