The Boyfriend of the Week

Before I address the incredibly beefcakey photograph above, I have some GREAT NEWS to share. My Canadian contact tells me today that Due South is definitely returning for a new season later this month! It's not gone after all! It was all just a wacky hoax! You have no idea how happy this makes me. Well, wait, maybe you DO have some idea. If not, go to the Boyfriend Gallery right now and look up Frasier's picture. THEN you'll have some idea. Look up Ray's picture while you're at it -- I promise you, you will not regret it.

Okay, so, why did I select such a cheesy photograph of this week's boyfriend Liam Neeson? The answer is two-fold. First, there is a surprising lack of good material on Neeson available on the web and I'm too lazy to bother with scanning photographs these days. Second, can you blame me? LOOK AT THOSE BICEPS, WOULDJA? Now, I know I usually post a nice little photograph of each boyfriend and then I say things like, "I like him because he's so nice and smart and talented." However, in Liam's case, I like him because he's SEXY and he has an accent. And that's about it. He's not a good actor, people! He's TERRIBLE!

I just watched a few Liam Neeson films, actually. Call it research. The first was "The Good Mother." YUCK, Liam! The second was (and I happened upon this purely by accident; I was really only watching it for Clint Eastwood) "The Dead Pool." (Bet you all forgot he was in that one, didn't you?) My God, Liam! You were terrible and yet so terribly irresistable! The third was "Michael Collins," a big stinker all around (even Alan Rickman failed me here, though I blame the material he had to work with, not the man himself.) In fact, I can honestly say the only movie I've ever seen that Liam Neeson was GOOD in was "Schindler's List," and despite his rave reviews, it really wasn't a very challenging part.

So, my affection for Liam Neeson (and it does run deep), has absolutely nothing to do with his ability to act (let's not even mention the movies "Ethan Frome" or "Darkman." Yeesh.) In these enlightened times, I admit I'm a bit ashamed to admit it, but here it is anyway: I love him for his looks and his voice. He could be dumb as a post and I'd still put him up here. LOOK AT THOSE BICEPS, PEOPLE! Yes, I'm ashamed. But not so ashamed I'm going to lie to you, loyal fans, and claim it's his talent and his philanthropic nature I'm after. No no. I just want to go on a date with him and kiss him all over. And I want him to talk. A lot. And that's it.

Disappointed? Look at the photo again. It'll all be okay.

MacGyver Factor Score: 92.999%. Points off for obscene lack of talent. But not TOO many points off.


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