The Boyfriend of the Week

January 17, 2000

This week's Boyfriend comes to you as the result of a blatant bribe. Disgusting how easily manipulated I am, isn't it? Yes, it's true. I intended to run somebody totally different, but a fan emailed me last week with the following message:

I was at the post office recently and I bumped into your ex-boyfriend Paul Gross. Man, he looks even better in person...if possible. Anyway I was dying to tell him about your web site (I think it's a very funny site) but I chickened out. I couldn't even say hello let alone explain to him the entire concept and content of your sight. Apparently he lives in my neighbourhood (Cabbagetown in Toronto) so if you do a feature on Eric Stoltz I promise to give the "Constable" your email address if I see him again. Ya?

YA! Well, how can you people expect me to say "No" to that? The Constable! Eek!

So, here's your dang Eric Stoltz write-up!

But it's not like it exactly torturous for me, since I totally adore Eric Stoltz and always have. In fact, I've been meaning to run him from the get-go. I've loved him ever since about 7th grade when I first saw "Some Kind of Wonderful" (you KNEW I was going to say that, didn't you -- in fact, it's fairly safe to assume that I love everybody and anybody who's ever been in a John Hughes movie. Well, except for Macauley Caulkin).

Mostly, I just thought he was extremely cute back then in 7th grade. But, since I've been a grown-up (37 hours, 43 seconds, and counting), I've noticed a lot more than just the red hair and cutie-pie smile. Remember the movie "Mask"? So amazing! And how about "Pulp Fiction"? "Memphis Belle"? I also liked "Little Women," "Sleep With Me," and "Bodies, Rest & Motion." And I'm totally unembarrassed to say I thought "Anaconda" was a lot of fun. Hey, any time Jon Voight gets eaten whole by a gigantic serpent is a good time to me. But let's not get into that right now.

And now a little something for the intellectuals among us: Eric was born in California in 1961. This is important because it means he's NOT too old for me. (Yeah, right, as if THAT were ever a consideration around here -- who do I think I'm fooling?) Wait, this is supposed to be the intellectual part. Sorry. Okay -- born in '61, attended USC for a few years and then dropped out, probably to pursue either acting or Bridget Fonda full-time. He's been in a wide variety of films, everything from indie movies like "Sleep With Me," to more main-stream stuff like "Little Women." According to one web site I looked at, Cameron Crowe adores him so much, he's promised Eric a role in every movie he makes from now until the end of time. Not too shabby, really. Another interesting little tidbit -- did you know that Eric Stoltz was the original Marty McFly in "Back to the Future"? He got part-way through the filming and was booted by the director for not being more kid-like. Hrm. Learn something new every day, doncha?

He's dated Ally Sheedy, which is something I respect heartily. And everybody knows about Eric and Bridget Fonda, right? The best part about THAT relationship is that it ended in 1998, leaving Eric single. I love it when that happens. Wouldn't it be great to date Eric Stoltz? Wouldn't dinner conversation be phenomenal?

Because it's more than looks, people, as I'm sure my Canadian friend would second. In fact, Eric Stoltz has actually got it all -- looks, talent, and a John Hughes movie under his belt. Who could resist? It's IMPOSSIBLE to resist! The only thing Eric lacks, as a matter of fact, is a red Mountie uniform and a guest-spot on MacGyver. Oh jeez, I'm soooo predictable. Really, though, Eric stands pretty solidly on his own in my Boyfriend world. No uniform, no theme song, no pocket knife, but he does have really incredibly great hair.

MacGyver Factor Score: 98.7%: I took a few points off for "Killing Zoe," but then I added most of them back since he may get me a message from the Constable some day. If I do hear from Paul Gross, you can bet I'll be eternally grateful to Eric Stoltz. I'll keep you posted!

IMDB page on Eric.


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