The Boyfriend of the Week
May 17, 1999
This week's Boyfriend comes via a reader request. Good thing too, because I was seriously lacking inspiration until I received her message which read, in part, "Elijah Wood! Elijah Wood! Elijah Wood!" Or maybe she said it only once and I made the rest up. I can't remember.
In any case, I DO know my first thought was, "Oh yes!" and my second was, "But wait, isn't he, like, TWELVE YEARS OLD?!" So, first I did a little investigating. Thankfully, I discovered Elijah is actually more like 17 or 18 years old. Which still means he's in violation of Meg's First Rule of Dating which is: Thou shalt not date ANY man born in the 1980's. However, as they say, rules are made to be broken. And rules of dating, doubly so. Take one look at Elijah's big blue eyes (or are they brown?) and TELL me you'd turn him down just because he's not old enough to buy beer. Heck, honey, I'LL buy the beer! You just come on over!
The best part about Elijah is that he's not just cute as a button. He's smart and talented too! I bet he gets straight A's in high school! And did you see him in Ang Lee's "The Ice Storm" (also starring ex-boyfriend Kevin Kline)? He was amazing! That was one of the best films of its year, and you can give little Elijah part of the credit for it.
He was also extremely sweet in "Paradise" (a movie I enjoyed despite the fact Melanie Griffiths was in it) and well, heck, I know I've seen him in other things, but I can't remember what they were. I'm sure he was cute in them, though. Because that's the lasting impression of Elijah that I have.
I heard he's got a couple of new movies coming out and I'm looking forward to them mostly because I like that picture up there of Elijah looking older than 12. He's one of the few child stars who actually didn't turn out looking downright freaky after going through puberty. I won't name names, but, for example, "The Wonder Years" just wasn't ANY fun after that summer when they all grew up. Yeesh! Thank god for small favors -- Elijah just got taller and kept his boyish charms and looks. That means when he's 75, he'll probably still be adorable. I love boys like that!
I just put the Huckleberry Finn movie he's in on reserve at the library and will report back after I've seen it. I can see Elijah as Huck mostly because he's got that "irresponsibly playful" look about him. Doncha think? Huck Finn is one of my all-time favorite stories, too, and I'm sure Elijah will do it justice. Expect a report some time next week!
In the meantime, somebody go rent "The Faculty" and tell me if I should bother renting it. I didn't realize Elijah was in it until I checked the IMDB to see what else he'd been in and I specifically remember thinking "Yeeeuck" when I saw the preview on tv. Does he make it bearable? Does he look 17 or 12 in it? Should I pay the three bucks or just let it go? Inquiring minds want to know! If you've seen "The Faculty," email me and let me know what you thought of it!
MacGyver Factor Score: 92.7% Points off because I have to wait at least 8 years before I can REALLY feel okay about dating him. BUT, points back for having such a convenient last name! If we got married, the whole "should I change my name? should I keep my name?" thing would be totally moot. Unless I wanted to go for the hyphenation. Meg Wood-Wood kinda has a nice ring to it. . .
The IMDB page for Elijah.